Sunday, February 28, 2010
I am now officially unemployed. My TAP ending on a rather high note last friday. The wonderful class of 5 Courage!!! Then after she helped me took the picture, she asked,"So who want to take photo with me?" then...ya u shd noe what happens la. As usual, the new comer acts as the good-guy while the form teacher becomes, in this case, the "bad woman" lor haha. Then she did something unexpected to sabo me. She asked,"So who want's Mr Ho's signature then?" GG, sure die. Next minute I am being swarmed by kids with papers n pens. Due to chaos and all, I had to make em stop, line up for their break and bring them down 1st. Then I had to sit down outisde the General Office, and sign for them. Lolz like "Qian Ming Hui" sia, also dunnoe why they wan my signature for. But its rather rewarding in a sense to see that in jus the short span of 3 weeks (since I din interact with them much during the 1st week), they would actually feel this way towards me :) Rest of the day was just packing up, returning stuff, clearing the VP2 room for the next occupaint and then going around the school to say goodbye to all the teachers who have helped me in one way or another. But before I left, I managed to get an overall assessment of my teaching from my mentor. Overall quite well. Considering the class i had to manage was not very bad, she said that my disciplining of class could be better. But to me, tats very personal opinion one. Different people can accept different levels of noises. What to her is unacceptable to me is still ok, so sometimes I will just let it pass but she will come and quieten down the class for me. But still when the class gets out of hand, I will shout, like really shout. Thats my trump card, sure effective one. Anyway she is the more experienced one, so her advice shouln't be wrong i guess. She also said I was good at discovering patterns and then presenting it the class to make it easier for the students to understand, so that's a plus. Another thing she commended on was my delivery, aka the way I teach, so ya was rather happy about it considering I am a stage shy person. Its weird how I will be very scared before the lesson, but when it comes time to do it and I say my first sentence, it all jus goes from there. Phew. So I guess teaching's ok for me then :) So that's how my TAP ended on a high note that day. Rather enriching and enjoyable experience, made me consider more about teaching as a career now. Moving on, sat went to NTU uni talk with wendy, jiayen, sharon, terence, zhiyong and sushan (in order of arrival haha). Sat thru a few talks, though the main one I was there for was the NIE and MOE talk. I would say the talks wern't exactly what i expected it to be. I was hoping for more info bout the course, what the demands are, curriculum etc, but most of what i got was where it was located on campus, the staff experience n facilities. What I found useful were the undergraduates there whom we can approach to ask questions. The one from NIE whom approached us and we talked to provided alot of information which was really good to consider with. And apparently, NY has been lying to us all these while, and Zhiyong got real happy. It seems that grades to enter NIE weren't as drastic to the points of onli A/Bs onli, so ya it was comforting. After that we went for lunch at kfc, walked around to find that both arcades at suntec n marina square dun hv jubeat T.T. So we settled down at macs at marina square to jus sit down n talk. Then ryan booked out, so we decided to meet the guy whom we can onli meet on weekends at bishan. Naturally, at bishan me n sharon played jubeat. Played a tag battle this time, and sharon thrashed me up down left right, not even bones were left behind sia. She is real pro la, I will have to practice more b4 we play again. But it was nice to be able to play jubeat with someone I know beside, so cool. Proceeded to Wan Chai cafe to eat, ryan arrived and got himself a mac meal where we went up to the balcony area of j8 to eat. Saw NYJC J1s dancing mass dance, so missing the good old days (when was the last time we did mass dance ah?). Talked till j8 closed b4 we all went home. All the way after the NTU talk, Zhiyong was really happy bout the fact that grades to enter NIE weren't that high at all. And so because of that he got super high, with max confidence in his A-levels. So looking at him ah, I was jus wondering to myself if i had the same level of confidence in my papers than him...defnitely dun hv. Still, its 2 good days :)
Bought around $20+ of gifts, stationary for the children n choc for my mentor (i really dunnoe what else to giv ma). So went to school, after making prior arrangements with my mentor to secure a 30min slot around the end of the day for me to tell the kids I am leaving. Wihtout any lessons in the morning, I spent it clearing up whatever backlog I had, basically marking practices. Within 1 hour, I was done. Looking around, I had totally nothing to do. Sianz. Took out the stationary for the kids, and proceeded onto slowly peel the price tags off one-by-one. After that with totally nothing on my hands, and the PE department being crazy over the height-and-weight taking, I went to help lor.
By then, lesson time. It was weird having to go through lesson, teaching the students knowing that later I will have to say goodbye to them. I set corrections for them to do, and then broke the news to them. "5C, today will be my last day teaching you all..." and that was followed by a millisecond stunned class and "ooorrrhhhhh...". So i went around giving out the stationary one by one, while receving "thank you"s from the kids. As I told em on the last day, I wasn't expecting to receive any gifts. But some of them actually dug into their pencil boxes to find things to give me. One of them, whom I'm rather close to, dug out a pen with a compass stuck onto it, and as he gave it to me, he said,"So you can find your way back here..." SOOOOO SWEET LA!!! can cry liao la
However by ethics, I had to return the gifts to them la, can't accept it. Still it was very nice of them. So i requested to my mentor to take a class photo with them :)
Revealed on [5:57 AM]
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The nite breeze blows against your face,
leaving wet trails on the cheeks,
as the tears get carried away.
You turned your head about,
bewilderment reveals on your face,
puzzled at how you arrived here in the first place.
Observing the surroundings around,
standing at the top of a hill,
clouds hindering your view of the bottom.
Paths at your toes and heel,
splitting the hill in two,
yet you cant see the outcome.
Unsure about moving forwards or back,
tears flow onto the knees,
squatted as you hope to hear a voice.
Sometimes in life, there are many decisions which we have to make that are beyond the comprehension of our minds alone. Clouded by our emotions, perceptions and sometimes assumptions, it makes it hard for us to make the final choice of what to do. A voice heard in time of need, is a voice that's worth to heed. Or in chinese, its called "Ju wai zhe ming" translated to be "those not involved are clear-headed". So ya, when you are facing a problem, why not try to find someone to talk it out with, to hear their opinion, and to bring you out of the clouds and into the open clear blue skies.
So thanks to ryan for talking to me the other day :)
Revealed on [4:03 AM]
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Why is CNY 15 days? Because people prepare so much food for Chu Yi that they will need 15 days of lunch and dinner to finish the remaining leftovers, or so that's what's happening to me la haha.
Went to Sushan's house for CNY celebrations yesterday. 1st time going to GOF's ppl house to bai nian leh. Initially Wendy was supposed to meet Sushan at 1.45 to pass her ice cream, then we meet Sushan at 2pm for lunch at kovan. Then suddenly Wendy wasn't feeling well so she wanted to meet us late, then I received an sms from Ryan asking for lan. But 1 sms later it was cancelled haha. In the midst it includes smses to Zhi Yong, whom we were wondering went MIA. So we now met up at 2.30pm at kovan mrt, along with Wendy who was feeling better. Terence led the wat to his house for bai nian, along the way with a few guesses on which house he lived in. Enjoyed CNY goodies, which were abundant everywhere, then went to his room for some L4D haha. It was funny to see Wendy playing with ter's childhood playtoys when Sushan and I play l4d haha.
Met up with Zhi Yong at Hougang MRT at 4.15, then proceeded to ntuc to get what little there is left to get for the steamboat. With 3 guys and 1 girl decision overuling Sushan's, we walkd to her house. So we put down our things, and sat by the TV to watch discovery channel (for more details of the show ask Zhi Yong for he watched that show 3 times already haha). Waited for arrival of Mich (whom I cordially sent Ter to fetch) and Jia Yen, before we started dinner!
Given the size of Sushan's kitchen, all huddled around the table and eat. As compared to eating at Ryan's big table, it was very different atmosphere. So we put food in the steamboat, and chatted while we were waiting for it to cook. If i remember correctly we enjoyed ourselves there for 1+hr, laughing, mainly at Jia Yen who was apparently "lost" at Sushan's house. She dosen't know Sushan had a TV, of which we were watching when she arrived, and she was wondering whether Sushan handwashed her clothes cos she cant find the washing machine, where her hand was resting on the whole dinner HAHA!!!
After dinner we siamed to Sushan's room, took photo before Wendy and Jia Yen left. As we sit down to look Sushan's photo album, her sec sch present from her friends, somehow the topic of A-levels results came up. Then we all started to dwell into the topic, worrying which course to go into, what kind of results would we all get, who will be the ones going up on stage etc etc. Things started to get a little depressing, until Sushan was lamenting on how she won't be able to fall asleep the nite before the reults, so we all decided on a sleepover the nite before the reults. To all sit down and meditate together to calm ourselves down or to all panic together.
And since we're on that topic, i shall insert in my view point here. When we get our results, whether we are happy or not depends on our expectations. There are some who are happy simply because they improved, even though the grades are not fantastic, yet there are those who strive onli for the best of the grades. Its all in the mentality one has i guess. For me, I'm just trying to convinvce myself that what's done is done, and I've already done what I could, so its all set. Its all a matter of what happens after I see my results. Just trying to maintain a Happy-Go-Lucky attitude I guess.
Also I want to comment bout the way results are given out. The school gives out the results in such a way that it rises from 3A's onwards if I remember correctly, all the way to 7/8A's. So it's basically a heart-thumping process of sitting there, holding your friend's hand tightly in hopes of your name being called. But what happens to those who's name wern't called. They all have to face the cruel reality of walking down to the atrium to collect their results, when their friends just walked up on stage. I agree with the fact that students who do good must be commended, that is understandable, but the sense of being left behind is just hard to bear la. On the otherhand, this is just my opinion, and I myself cant tink of n alternative to the arrangement, so I believe that the school has thought about it and felt that it was the best course of action i guess.
Countdown:
1 week till my MOE attachment ends
Approximately 2/3 week to results (I hope considering no one knows when it will be released)
Revealed on [3:36 AM]
Thursday, February 18, 2010
The first thing that happen when i report for work after CNY hols was that I had to relief all my mentor's lessons. Apparently she was on mc, so I, being her Teacher Assistant, am up for the job. Called her like after assembly, onli for her to tell me that she has a social study lesson at that very period. So I went to her table to grab the list of things for the relief teacher to do, and then chionged up to class.
Went into class, got greeted. I looked at the list, it says "Teach chapter X, on Farqhuar's (i not sure how to spell) contribution to singapore". I was like...Uh who is tat???!!! The last time i took SS was in Sec sch, and i din even remember who tis guy was. Panic ah!!! Siao liao how to teach lik tat. I then decided to buy more time for myself. "Class read pg X to pg X" Haha :) So smart hor me. When they were reading, I faster sat down and started to flip thru to see what I can absorb and teach. Came up with some very sketchy points, and jus pia with it lor. Lucky it all went smoothly.
Then after tat its back to my "form" class. Maths was ok, cos I've been planning it for awhile, jus din expect to actually use it yet. Then after tat was 3 periods of ENG. Siao liao, again nothing planned. Never even taught 1 lesson of eng b4, how to do sia. So i jus pia again lor, wat to do. Had to cover 3 poems (erm I AM NO LIT STUDENT!!!). So i got them read the lines one-by-one, and explained it as far as my lit knowledge allows me. Hopefully they understood la haha.
So ya, was kena bomb-shelled lik tat rite after cny. Spontaneous thinking on the spot, and I am no spontaneous person. Claps to myself for surviving it.
Revealed on [2:14 AM]
Thursday, February 11, 2010
This idea came up when i "malu"ed myself infront of my class last friday.
Was leaving the General Office, walking through the concurse and i conveniently missed my class who were qeueing up right infront of me with their science teacher. Then just as i was walking past em, i heard someone call out "Mr Ho!". I turned around, saw the science teacher staring at me, tot i heard wrongly and turned back. Then i heard it again, this time accompanied by familiar laughter, so i turned my head once more, lowered my angle abit and saw the kids. HAHA dam malu la!!! I jus waved bye and siamed liao.
I guessed tat happens because i was too accustomed to look straight from my point of view, to see adults eye-to-eye, that i have to read adjust myself to actually look lower than usual to see those innocent (when they are not mis-behaving) kids. As we all slowly grow up, accompanied by people of our age, we tend to jus look straight in our field of vision, to focus on those whom we spend majority of our time with. So while sitting in class doing observation, i actually came up with how our PoV( Point of View) actually changes as a persons grows, and i tink the example is very apt.
A kid's point of view is mainly focused on his desk. Right infront of him would be the books sprawled out, a pen lying on it hoping for the work to complete itself. Lying around the books would be the little knick-knacks, like small toys, pens with ruler stuck across it (if u get what i mean) and like a box of country erasers (my pri sch time toy). Such are the distractions that are found in the child's world. Kids of a higher education level would most probably have different distractions. The mp3 lying on the table, music seeping out through the ear phones, the handphone propped nicely standing directly infront of the kid in order to not miss any sms, or even the "te deng" sounds that comes when someone initiates a msn convo.
Then when a kid grows up into a teenager/to-be adult, his PoV widens. It extends to his whole room, the place he tinks its his personal paradise. The bedsheets left lying crumpled from the morning madness, the sweaty uniform hung on the cupboard knob if not on the person, posters of movies or favourite rock bands covering the walls. The more talented ones will have guitar lying by the wall in some corner, with books stacked up on the floor. He/she will stay in there, if not at outings, to stay away from the pains that they tink they feel, the stress, the results and the care from their parents. That room would be a personal expression of the teenager, his world, the one to his own.
Entering into adulthood, our vision expands all out, possibly the furthest one will ever reach, looking out through the windows to see the world outisde. The adult sees the bigger pictures in a sense, able to stretch out of their personal space, to see the things that concerns not only them. They pin their hopes on the schools that can be viewed through the windows, in hopes of their child getting a place, the park nearby that their folks will hang out in the morning, the market just a stone throw away to relieve the sunday mornings spent there with the family. They used such things, as distractions from the the laptop that lays on their work desk, on almost 24 hours a day, always trying to pull the adults away from what he/she tinks is most impt. The scene outside they see, is but a meer reminder of what they perserve daily for.
When one enters old age, their sight fails them. They no longer see as far they used to be able to, but focus on what's around them, those that they are able to see, are familiar with and having feelings for. Their rooms are cluttered with things that they hold dear to, things that have been in their PoV since young. No matter how frail old age makes one to be, they still try their best to walk out of that room, to join the family they hold dear to in the living room. To show care and concern occasionally but making food (whether the family appreciates or not), to buy things for the little kids and to try and persuade the teens to go out with them just to make them feel wanted. The old do so, simply to hold on to the those that they are still able to see, until they no longer can.
That's how our PoV evoles as we grows, widening and eventually fading out. So in a way, are we being restricted by our PoVs...?
Revealed on [4:34 AM]
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
That's what I'm being addressed as in school now, haha. Feels weird that while the students call me Mr Ho, my mentor still calls me Dalvin. It's almost as if I am stuck in between the classroom and the staffroom haha :)
Anyway, conducted my first co-teach lesson today. Basically I was upfront at the whiteboard, while the form teacher sits at the back. I would say I did pretty well, comment from my mentor was "generally quite well" :) Being the one who is nervous of public speaking, going up to teach wasn't as easy u see it is ok, even if the audience are jus primary 5. Had to plan abit beforehand, what to teach, in what way can we make it simpler and to check for understanding. Oh ya, it was freaking hot to be standing with the visualiser shining down at you. Now I know why sometimes teachers sweat so much.
And teaching requires quite abit of on-the-spot thinking. I dunnoe why, but when i was sitting at the back of the class doing observation, equivalent fractions seemed to be pretty hard for the students to understand. So of course I planned longer to dwell on that point for my lesson, yet somehow or rather, as if they received enlightenment overnight, they suddenly became very pro at it. All the ques I threw at them they could handle with ease (apart from some careless mistakes and presentation errors), other than that they seem fine. So I was quite taken aback, and had to take the time when the i ask students to come up to the board to fill in answers to think of alternative strategies...wooo I tell you that was not expected. But it all went well in the end. Lesson done, homework issued (awwwww...so sad rite I 1st day teach giv homework liao) and matters cleared, I would say today was generally good :)
Also, the students were quite well-behaved. Din hv any attitude problems, jus some shyness to come up and present. Otherwise, all's good. Mayeb it was cos the form teacher was at the back, or they jus wanted to act nice and lure this new teacher in before they kill him!! AARRRHHH!!! joking
Oh ya the students were dam nice today. When I left school, it was supposedly their break for inbetween supplementary class (3pm). I walked out of the general office, and then kena spotted by the class. Then they very sweetly walked me out all the way to the school gate. On the way, me and andrew were like "OMG I AM BEING STALKED AH!!!" HAHA!!! So cute of them la :)
Revealed on [4:53 AM]
Friday, February 5, 2010
Knocked off at 2 yesterday, cos andrew had to leave early and i had no more lessons nor meeting to attend. So i finished up my work and left at 2, leaving a note on my mentor's table. She's always very busy, can see her rush here rush there, super busy teacher. So i'm guessing she's very experienced.
Perks of leaving at 2, can go meet up with zhiyong and sushan last minute for kbox session at amk (wendy couldn't make it cos of work)! woohoo! Ever since xiao gui released his first debut album i so much wanted to sing his songs. So ya, at a rate of $8.80, and armed with a glass of very awesome oreo chocy drink, we sang to our hearts content. Dam shiok :) Been 1 month since i last sung if i remember correctly. Zhiyong had to leave 15mins earlier, cos he had outing with his sec sch friends. Then after zhiyong left, the system for kbox hung! the tv jus blacked out and the lights dimmed, before total blackout as the staff fiddled with the switches. So ya i was left in the darkness, laughing at sushan who was complaining that she cant sing her songs HAHA! Apparently sushan said i sang more songs, but i tink its cos there's onli the 3 of us that's why. And i still tink i cant sing, well not as good as sushan and zhiyong at least, but its the company tat counts. Might hv to prepare more new songs b4 our next k session, which i believe will be a long time away.
On that note, with 90% of GOF going to work/working, i foresee a huge decline in GOF activities after CNY. After all, most jobs require employees to work ard the afternoon. So i'm guessing we will jus hv to meet up lesser than. Maybe bcos of sch days where i get to GOF daily, nowadays i tend to miss going out with GOF alot more than usual although another possibility could be due to the fact that in dec we spent lots of hours, if not days, together. Haiz how i wish we can meet up more often. Anyone interested jus call/sms me. Even though i am on MOE attachment, i usually can end ard 3, so ya still can enjoy a bit of afternoon, and if not dinner?
While i am typing this, I am wondering if there's is anyone free to go out with me this afternoon (sat), cos evening going out with parents to chinatown. But then again, why am i typing this here?
Revealed on [7:17 PM]
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Dun ask me why the title sounds so sad, Ryan named it himself, so as a guy who still has 3 more months before i enter NS i am not going to fight with him.
Had lunch with 2 pe teachers from kcpps on wednesday, cos both of them are suppose to be me n my fellow trainee's buddies during this one month. So as buddies, they are basically there to help us solve any problems that we might face tat is non-academic based, cos i guess our mentors are busy ppl. So i was having lunch with both of them, cos my friend had lessons, so we went over to kcpss to eat. Then we were talking and talking, and they mentioned that one of the perks of being a teacher is that it is the only, if not the rare few, occupations that allows you to catch afternoon movies :)
That being said, on wed i knocked-off at 3, took bus to thomson plaza to meet zuyao, zhiyong and ryan family. Dunnoe wat i was doing there, cos i dunnoe how to choose ingredients, for company i guess. A very short ride later, we are at ryan's house. Put down things, on com and before we knew it, ryan, zhiyong and i were peeling prawns (smelly hands!!!). After we washed our hands, it was onto peeling potatoes. Then i moved to the kitchen with zuyao, while zhiyong went to play diablo. So i helped zuyao to cook the soup (hey i did help ok! even though i was only listening to zuyao, i did help leh haha). So after much sweat (not into the soup) and saliva (both mine n zuyao's and little ryan's into the soup), tadah done :) (oh ya and 2 releases from zuyao if u know what i mean). And also credits to those who mashed the potatoes (din manage to see who so credit yrself).
In between there was alot of fetching ppl done by ryan. So after almost all arrived, and pretty much tons of suanning going on, dinner time! With soup on the go and zuyao cooking steak, it was a great meal! To jus sit down at the table, happily chat with friends and all, woohoo!!! Desert was smoothis, if u can count that as desert oh and popcorn.
Yet sadly due to work commitment, i had to leave rather early, at 10, which was max sian :( What to do, end early must go early ma haha.
Still, the cook-out was great!!! (oh ya i managed to finish typing this while having mass convo on the thur nite, b4 ryan went in).
Revealed on [4:13 AM]
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
MOE attachment started, 2 days into it. Hvnt gotten thru much, mainly observation and talk with my mentor to know bout bits and pieces of school life. Will blog about it (which ever parts i am allowed to) when i've experienced more, for now here's a short ramble to tide u readers over.
Having been in a primary school for 2 days, my ears got a sharp reawakening to the much "delightful" sounds i use to hear, and conveniently forgotten. So here's a list of sounds that i've heard recently, or can recall hearing thru my12 long years of education...
Pri sch:
1) Very piercing screams, for reasons what so ever.
2) Good morning teacher (feels good to hear tat haha!)
3) Teacher but he kick me 1st...no he take my pencil box 1st!!! etc etc (u get the gist)
4) More to come...
Sec sch:
1) Giv me 20! (uni grps)
2) The soccer ball slamming against the corridor, that is if it does not hit yr head 1st.
JC:
1) Happy birthdays in canteen
2) This is the most dreadful to some people, or rather alot of ppl. A certain someone calling yr name either at the corridor or jus from one floor away, which simply means that a braincell massacre is about to occur that very nite :) due to the fact that i dun noe who is reading my blog, it shall be termed the certain someone haha
Ok this post is going no where. Let's stop it here. Farewell at ryan's tml. Hope i can end early and reach early.
Revealed on [4:09 AM]
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Tell me. boku ga sagashite iru...
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Taiyou ni akogarete
Takaku takaku tonda tsubasa
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Fukai umi e to ochite yuku
Odayaka na minamo ochita namida no hitoshizuku ga nami wo tate
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Tsuki ga sotto kata wo tataki
minamo utsushite kureta kiiro michi
________________________________________________
Looking up to the sun
Flying high, up high on wings
The heat dissolves them
and he falls into the deep sea.
A single tear drops into the serene water, creating a wave
That wave is blown by the wind and reaches far away.
The moon gently massages my shoulders
reflecting a yellow path on the water surface.
________________________________________________
Slowly carving a path through the world by on his own...