All the punishments and all, they are just in the lesson plan. So here I am, entering my last week in tekong island as a recruit. It dosen't seem that far ago tat I was in my civies, filled with uncertainties as I carry my field pack and dragged my duffel bag into the coy which I now am so happy to be in. Having gone through 8 weeks of it all, heaven or hell, sweat or tears, its now coming to an end, my life as a recruit. But through it all, I have gained some habits, good or bad i dunnoe, but tis shd be a suitable topic for my post before POP.
Just gonna type in accordance to whatever comes to my mind, so no particular order then: 1) I normally dun like to wear watches around my wrist, but now I permanently have one ard on hand. I mean why have a watch when your phone has a clock function? But when your in NS, where your phone is secured in that locker of yours, your watch is your best friend liao. So now I have a watch that I wear almost 24/7, and I am proud to say it bears mud stains from my fieldcamp that I cant wash off too :) I also just recently received a free Discovery Channel watch, which is 2 clocks in one, and I tink its so cool, gonna use it as my outing watch.
2) Reading newspaper. My friends will know that I never had the habit of reading papers, never, not even for GP. My onli source of info, news. But when your in army, the onli thing thats entertaining is that set of Straits Times and Newpaper that is delivered not very on time daily. So ya now I've started reading papers, and it has sort of taken on a habit. Sometimes on weekends I wan to read papers too, but due to the short "time of freedom" that I have, I cant haha.
3) I dun even noe if tis is a habit. What happens when you see guys walking around at least half-naked in bunk all the time, you start to wish you had more muscles (sushan dun start laughing again). You walk around, see people with huge biceps and abs, our new sarg has such huge biceps, we call him Bicepman. So ya I find myself looking at my tummy, always wondering if it is fat or muscles, but one thing is for sure, I dun hv abs. Need to train more sit ups and bridges.
4) Spending habit. As NSF, we draw an ALLOWANCE of $420, yes allowance not pay. And considering I have family commitments, and I am hoping to save up for uni, it really dosen't leave me much to save up for. So now I try to limit myself to $20 per outing, and am glad to say so far I've been able to reach the quota. But one thing I failed to factor in, and that is my block leave OMG! I find myself now always thinking of which is more value for money, and sometimes even hv to control on things I wan to buy, like food. Even when I wan to buy my book in snacks, I must also search for which is the most value for money (Ritz for the win!). Wat to do, ppl poor ma. But block leave cant scringe, or I need my freedom of enjoyment then definitely. You can call me Aunty Dalvin HAHA!
5) Eating! I eat like a dinosaur now. I eat every and anything. I eat alot, ALOT ALOT! All I do nowadays at home is munch n munch. I am not saying the cookhouse food is bad, its quite good actually. I now go cookhouse eat must ask the aunty to "jia fan:. But 5 days in tekong, where you cant choose wat you wan to eat, and its caifan daily, you will definitely want outside food alot. So when I bookout, I immediately chiong food. Dunk it all into my stomach! I've kinda actually forgotten how it feels to be really hungry, cos nowadays at home I am always snacking! Even in bunk I also hv my biscuits to munch on. Sometimes I wonder to myself whether I eat because I am hungry, or cos I have the craving. But one thing's for sure, all this increase in appetite is making me...heavier. I weigh 54kg now, my highest ever! I dunnoe whether it is muscles or fats, thats the worrying thing. OMG. I tink most of my money goes to food.
6) I feel weird everytime I go out. As per every NS man, we all are close to being bald. So much so it is like a status liao. So everytime I go out, with or without my uniform, I get people looking at me, and i get the "you are a NSman look". It jus feels weird lo, but not to the extent I wan to get a hat to cover my head la. Nothing wrong with being a NSman.
7) I start to use "cui" alot. And I can link almost anything to army now. I tink tis applies to all NSman la, what to do 5 days a week we're all in that island. Although I try my best to not say it out, try to best to stay out of army once I bookout, otherwise people like sushan will complain haha.
Ok thats all I can tink of for now...so these shd be it ba. My NS habits...
Revealed on [8:42 AM]
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Friday, June 18, 2010
.:. Is this enough? .:.
Is this how giving your best is supposed to feel like? Had alot of time to think about things on the long long MRT ride from Joo Koon all the way home. This week wasn't exactly a good week for me in tekong, lets just say things din really go my way.
Had my final IPPT on wed morning. As usual had to wake up at 4am, then prepare for all the tests. Giving my best for all the stations, I managed to attain gold standard for all the stations thus far. But then, it just had to happen. It rained, and not only did it rain, it POURED. It rained like never before, rained the whole day! (Yes its the same day as when Singapore Orchard Road got flooded) And because of this, we couldn't do our 2.4km run. For those who do not know, the 2.4km run is supposed to be done like within a certain time after the stations. So yes, because of the rain, my gold standard went down the drain like tat! I was sooooooo sian for that day...
Then the day after tat I had my SOC test. Because I have to reIPPT, I had to protect the blisters on my hand for the next IPPT. So this time I used gloves. And then, very sadly, the gloves did me down. First time I was using the glove, but then the gloves were totally slippery and I could't climb up the rope. By the time I removed my gloves to try again, my arms totally cui already...So ya failed it. No need to elaborate on how sian I was feeling already...
I entered the week feeling up, gonna try my best for the IPPT n SOC, but in the end this happened, despite the fact I did try my best already. So what happened. I tot that when a person tried their best, they are supposed to feel good even when they fail, cos they did their best already. Or is it simply because I didn't gave it my all. Yet how does one know what is their best, or some say, their all. Everytime we are par-taking in an activity itself, we feel the pain, the fatigue, the mental anguish to battle the very thought to give up. Then immediately after we finish, we plonk ourselves on the ground, and suddenly all those feelings disappear, and we are all energised again. So does this mean that we havent actually gave our ALL in that activity? Who can tell what is "your best"?
One thing I know for sure, NS certainly does not allow us to give our best in terms of spending time with our families. Out of 7 days in a week, we get like at max 2 days to spend time with our families, and this does not include timing to be split with friends or gfs. What makes me think so. Because this week, one of my bunkmates had to leave the island in the middle of the nite on a special ferry because someone in his family jus passed away. Can you imagine waking up in the middle of the nite, seeing the guy packing his bag and leaving, and then only the next day you find out that is the reason. And the nite b4 there he was jus happily talking to the person. Talking to family members on the phone is definitely nothing compared to meeting them in person. I can only imagine how sad he must be feeling...
Ok maybe its the sum of all these things that are making me, and thus this post, so emo.
On the lighter side, I know something that is the Best, thats the support that family and friends can give, whether they know it anot. Being away from society for 5 days a week, one of the most important things to keep me sane is the smses with friend and the nitely call to my family. Even though we dun talk alot thru the phone in that short period of time, but being able to hear their voices is super comforting. And also being able to sms friends, regardless of the content, its jus simply super comforting. Its what makes me go on through the day, hoping to read the smses, or jus to simply go back to bunk to see the photos up on my mirror. And also the outings with gof, although we dun do as much as post A-levels, but seeing them alone is more than sufficient enough me. I also dunnoe how to describe it anymore. I am just grateful.
Revealed on [7:09 AM]
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Sunday, June 13, 2010
.:. Views from a distant sky .:.
These fingers are not for pulling the trigger, but for touching your face. More than once i've experienced this in BMT. Somehow or rather, being an island away from mainland Singapore, Tekong seems to have a weather system of its own. One can never predict whether it is going to be sunny, cloudy, rain or pour. You can have the afternoon sun blazing down on your neck one minute, and just one 'kiss of the floor' later, it suddenly rains like nobody's business. Who know's why?
Also, the cloud formations in the tekong is superbly beautiful at times. The occasional commercial airlines that flies overhead makes me lift my head from time to time, and be awed at the fluffy cloud formations formed. Or say just during my SIT test, was doing the morning march when we walked past this open field. As it was super early in the morning, there was this layer of thin mist covering the plains of tall grass. If only I had a DSLR with me then, I tell you it would make a very nice desktop wallpaper. But it did serve its purpose of distracting me from the routine march haha.
With my high key events for BMT over, I am now very much looking to 3 weeks from now. POP! then its time to spend time with family, friends and some alone time. Alone time is certainly something I am lacking of right now, which makes it hard for me to think about stuff. Maybe gonna grab a book, and head down to like coffee bean or such, and at most hv like 1 friend to accompany me?
Oh, i am very scared of getting fat lately...hehe XD
Cya readers in 4 days...hopefully haha :)
Revealed on [7:56 PM]
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Saturday, June 5, 2010
.:. Field Camp .:.
I survived a field camp!
The most highkey event of BMT is over for me liao, hurray x) 5 days in the jungle, doing mission based activities and eating not very delicious food. I got thru all of it. I expected worst of field camp la, as in seriously. From all the stories i heard and such, I definitely mentally expected myself to be suffering alot more during the 5 days. But oh well, tis is my company :)
But I found field camp to be not as bad as what others describe it to be. The things done there were more realistic, in the sense its more like what you would actually apply during war. Just makes it seems much more like Army as compared to a regular camp lo. So ya for it was actually quite enjoyable in that sense, quite heartening too.
Combat rations ma, its edible. Not exactly gourmet food but dosen't taste half as bad as what some describe it out to be, some are actually quite good. And the good about eating fibreless food for 5 days, u dun hv to go to the toilet XD ( yes girls be shocked or watever that i 5 days never go toilet and do business liao haha) and trust me it really helps alot when the toilet point is sooooooooo far.
One thing I find ironic about the field camp, is tat I tink it severly brings down one's physical condition. Number one, its 5 days without any physical training activities at all, like jogging and all. So I am expecting it to be quite detrimental to my stamina and such. We're out there in the field for war, yet we are getting unfitter by the day...how ironic can tat be. Number 2, its like wat my commander said, "You are not shag, just mentally tired". Its true. We do on average about 1 activity a day ba, and the activites are all not strenous, as in it dosen't really stretch you beyond your physical limits. Yet somehow or rather, jus bcos we are dirty, covered with mud and all, we feel super tired. Jus shows how much control the mind has over the body, and how field camp is used to toughen up your mentality. I've done it, 5 days through field camp, what cant I do?
So ya, staying 5 days in the jungle, without any contact with the outside phone, no daily comfort of smsing friends and calling family, no photos to look at (you dunnoe how much looking at the photos pasted on my cupboard mirror means to me), now its finally over. The supposedly most highkey event of BMT is over now. Yet, it feels weird cos I am onli into my fifth week in BMT. When we endedour field camp and returned to company line, we saw new recruits enlisting with their family and gfs. And there we are jus finished our field camp, and it feels oddly just familiar how not long ago we were like them. Hmmm...
Oh well, I'm more than halfway thru my BMT phase, so its just abit to go, tahan abit more, crave abit more, look forward to my block leave abit more and then POP!
Revealed on [8:35 PM]
.:. PMD .:.
Pooh sits on the window ledge silently Memories yet as clear as day.
Wearing matching color coincidentally In between the shops of Marina Square Looking for food up and down Lounging along with the orchard crowd.
Many steps we took In completion of the memorable hike Saddening this has to happen Sanguine you are still near. Promises of our heart be held, Dalvin knows, this is not the end, but another happy beginning.
This is for you, <3>
PMD
Revealed on [2:51 AM]
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Messages
Tell me. boku ga sagashite iru...
Kotae ni mo itsuka wa mabushii hikari ga sasu?
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Credits
Friends who have helped/encouraged in any way during the whole process :)
PVs:
Supernova
Inherited system
Ride the wind
Message
Aozora no namida
This love never ends
Feel the same
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Tell me. I am looking for...
an answer. Will I receive a bright ray of light?
Kakegae no nai inochi sono saki ni wa sekai ga
Hirogatte yuku no hara...kono sekai no tame ni
________________________________________ Ryan Sushan Michelle ZhiYong Sharon Diane Wendy Wenzhen 0804 Matt Woon Ching Long Yuan Nicholas
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Irreplacable life on this world
...it spreads for the sake of this world.
Gundam Freak
No one ever knows boku no oto
Doko made mo shinka suru
Mada shiranai jibun ga mezameteku
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Name: Dalvin
He values friendships to the highest degree. He may seem quiet to those who do not know him, but for the fortunate who do they know he is always there for them whenever they need it, wherever they need it. He puts great importance in his honour, and will do anything to uphold it.
Luvs:
Family
Friends
Teachers
Gundam!!!
Japanese Music
Kamen Rider
Anime
Training academies:
St Gabriel's Primary School -> 1D,2D,3B,4B,5A,6A
St Gabriel's Secondary School -> 1E3,2E3,3E1,4E1
Yishun Junior College(1st 3 months) -> P09
Nanyang Junior College -> 0804
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No one ever knows my sound
I everlastingly evolve
A part of myself that I wasn't aware of is awakening.
Hobbies
Unmei no naka chisa na hoshi umareru mitai ni
Afuredasu kanjou ga kono karada tsukiyaburi
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This is a section that will be under construction. I am planning it to be like a record of my Gundam collection. For now, I will only be adding the names, photos will come next.
And when there is time for me to consistently work on my panel-lining, I will be posting photos of the process. For now, make do with it :)
Gundam Seed series:
Cgue
Aile Strike(including the sword and launcher packs)
Buster
Aegis
Raider
Calamity
Freedom + Meteor Unit
Justice
Gundam Seed Destiny series:
Gouf Ignited
Murasame
Force Impulse
Saviour
Gaia
Shiranui Akatsuki
Gundam Astray/MSV
Strike Dagger
Astray Red Frame
Gundam Stargazer:
Strike Noir
Gundam 00 series:
Union Flag
Exia
Virtue
Kyrios
Throne Zwei
Throne Eins
Gundam 00s2 series:
Cherudim
Another of my hobby is not only listening, but also memorising the Japanese lyrics. So this section would also be dedicated to the songs I've accomplished.
Supernova - Singer: Keto Soji, Band: Tetra Fang
Colors of the Heart - UVERworld
Upcoming: Chance! - UVERworld
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Like a little star born in destiny
Overflowing passion breaks thorugh my body
the One-Winged Angel
Imperfection at its best
Taiyou ni akogarete
Takaku takaku tonda tsubasa
Sono netsu ni tokasareta
Fukai umi e to ochite yuku
Odayaka na minamo ochita namida no hitoshizuku ga nami wo tate
Sono nami wa kaze ni fukare haruka kanata ni made mo todoku you ni
Tsuki ga sotto kata wo tataki
minamo utsushite kureta kiiro michi
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Looking up to the sun
Flying high, up high on wings
The heat dissolves them
and he falls into the deep sea.
A single tear drops into the serene water, creating a wave
That wave is blown by the wind and reaches far away.
The moon gently massages my shoulders
reflecting a yellow path on the water surface.
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Slowly carving a path through the world by on his own...